I flew Delta when I went home for Christmas. In an effort to make their “Food for Purchase Program” seem exciting and different, the menu items all had flowery descriptions. I can understand long summaries for foods like salads and fancy breakfast sandwiches, hell even the hummus and veggies. But do you really need the following to understand a bagel:

“Bagel: prepared in the old world method, this bagel is simple and satisfying. Served with cream cheese and strawberry jam.”

I learned on the flight back to New York that “the old world method” means “slightly chilled, uncut, and in a plastic bag.”